When ya got it...FLAUNT IT!!!

Yes, that WOULD be a king sized bag of marbles!

...and to answer your question before you even ask...YES, Playgirl has been contacted!  Gives a whole new meaning to "Crown Jewels", doesn't it!  So, after THE KING had his dip, we went to look at what the last Emperer of Vietnam lived like...in his summer palace.

As far as I can tell, it's designed by Frank Lloyd Wright's Alabama cousin, Mr. Claude Almost Wright, of the Crowfart, Alabama Wright's!  It's sort of a cross between Graceland and Motel 6...the way Motel 6 was when they charged $6.00.

...as my good buddy Terry would say..."it's good from far, but far from good!"

...I have to admit, it's a pretty funky livingroom!

...after we did the ultimate tourist visit, we headed into town for a little market time.  Had to stop in at our regular little restaurant for some take out!

...and stumbled across another breathe taking Vietnamese beauty!

...and this little cutie!

Day 5 in Da Lat...what a country!  The people are so happy here...everywhere I go, I hear happy laughter...sometimes they even point and laugh...they are such happy people!

ALL HAIL KING CORONA!!!

Yes amigos...it's good to be KING!!!  Cool duds eh?  My first royal act was to order a king size rum and coke!...my snooty look!

 

...one r&c down...let's have another!

...OOOOOH...good one....maybe just one more!

...that was GOOOOOOOOOOD...les hab another!

...COR KINGORA SAS MORE!!!...hmmm......KINCORA GUNNNA PUKE....

...oh oh...maybe a royal nap....the paparazzi is not impressed...

...I think I should sneak out of town...take me to the train station...cool!

...hey, they have an old steam train...let's go!

...doesn't look like they've used it for a while...hey, is that what I think it is?

IT'S RUSSIAN!  I knew it...

Those Russians...the ultimate in luxury!  Ok, enough of the Russkie propaganda...isn't there a church around here that is locked up and we can't get into?

...hey, look at what that statue is looking at...

...looks different the other way...

...ok, enough religion...let's have lunch at the market...look at what the put on those scooters!...

 ...artichokes...yum...

 ...oh, look at that...the sign says Russian secret agent hangout!...

...wow...what a beautiful old lady...

...look at that face!...

...after her, there is nothing as beautiful...not even this!

AAAAAAAAAHHHH...being King is good!!!

I told ya...ya didn't believe me, but I told ya!

I've got to get this off my chest...WE PLAYED GOLF IN VIETNAM...NA NA, NA NA NA!!!!!  Not just any old golf course, but

...a little lunch before we played...

...got our caddies...

 ...and off to the links...

Cassandra couldn't wait to show her stuff...but we played golf anyway!  hahaha

So....I told ya...ya didn't believe me, but I told ya!  Here we were on a nice golf course...

...yes, nice golf course with a yellow building in the distance...and THERE IT IS!  SEE...TOLD YA!!!

Oh ya...Mr. Corona has gone psycho all right!  How much more proof do you need?  Our caddies spoke Russian the whole time, I swear!  OK, maybe that's a lie, but never mind...they are EVERYWHERE!!!

After golf, we went into town to pick up some stuff...and here was a statue (see the antennae on top) welcoming signals from mother Russia...

...we almost took this alley to escape our surveillance...

...ended up at our fav little take-out place.  There we found the Nun/Hells Angel Momma/Biker chick/MiG 23 pilot getting ready for a quick trip back to Moscow, to report in!

...and here is a fake street sweeper checking in with the fake corn vendor...SPEAKING RUSSIAN!!!

Well, let's not talk about THAT anymore!

I almost lost a leg...

Damned near terminal wound don't ya think...

...can you believe I've been walking around on that...jeez, the leg is barely attached!  I thought about a cast but you can't use a cast to hold your leg on!  I got that in this never ending battle with the Russians...the bullet may still be in there!  Cassandra tells me that I have burdened you with our Russian problem enough...we can let the embassy deal with the espionage stuff.  Hey, how 'bout some pretty pictures?

 

I want you to know that I posted these pictures instead of having my leg re-attached...I think that deserves at least 5 crude comments...come on, I know you want to tell me to f*&# off...go ahead, if I can deal with that blister, bring it!!!